Connirae Andreas is the creator of the “Naturally Slender Eating Strategy.” She is also one of the original co-developers in the field of Neuro Linguistic Programming.
As a therapist and trainer, she has helped thousands of people to overcome fears, phobias and various other experiences in their lives that have blocked their lives.
Back in 2007 I was leading a group of women through a program I created called, “Losing Weight without Dieting.” At the time I was working on getting my Master Practitioner Certification for Neuro Linguistic Programming. It was there that I learned about Connirae’s contributions in the field of NLP.
Kevin Creedon, one of my instructors told me about her work in developing her Naturally Slender Eating Strategy. After doing some of my own research and watching several of her instruction videos, I knew that I wanted to have her coach me.
I was so frustrated and wanted to know why all my clients were losing weight and I was steadily gaining weight.
The insights Connirae shared with me back then rocked my world! To put it in a nutshell she is the person who taught me about the need for self-compassion and how to give that gift to myself.
After I shared a bit about my background, and my long and frustrating history with dieting, and the shaming self-talk/thoughts I was wrestling with , she explained to me that I was being much too hard on myself and it wasn’t serving me at all. It was making me feel miserable.
you were raised in an alcoholic, abusive and neglectful environment where criticism and chaos was the norm, you probably have a lot of challenges with knowing how to be kind to yourself. This is because living under stressful conditions has long-term effects similar to PTSD.
The insights Connirae shared with me back then rocked my world! To put it in a nutshell she is the person who taught me about the need for self-compassion and how to give that gift to myself.
To get more information and read the strategy in its entirety, read “Heart of the Mind, the book she co-authored with Steve Andreas, her recently deceased husband.
This post and several others like it will take excerpts from our interview back in March of 2007.
Now I want to describe the first guideline in following Connirae’s Naturally Slender Eating Strategy.
Guideline # 1 is Choosing Foods that Kiss your Being. Connirae recommends and encourages you to visualize your food choice as the loving mother depicted in the photo and you as the infant child seeking nourishment.
Choose Foods To Nourish Yourself and Show Kindness To Your Body
As we began the interview, I asked Connirae what was the first thing that she considers most important when she is eating as a slender woman, she told me that she is seeking nourishment from her food and wants to be kind to herself.
She defined being kind to herself as making choices and wanting to eat foods that make her body happy. She said that these were typically foods that create a good feeling in her body. She described an image of tucking a child in at night and sending them off to sleep with a loving kiss.
She said that she prefers to choose foods that kiss her being. She explained that she wants to choose foods throughout the day that give her a nice light hum. For the most part, she prefers to eat foods that are organic and high quality.
Connirae gave some examples of some favorite ways that she considers being good to herself. For example, since she lives in Colorado, where it is often cold, she feels that it is especially nurturing to enjoy a big bowl of chicken soup chock full of vegetables. In the summer, she prefers to eat foods that would naturally cool her body such as salads and cooler treats like fruit and yogurt.
Choose Foods That “Kiss Your Being”
According to Connirae, foods that kiss your being are those that will be gentle and assimilate into your system effortlessly with no irritation or pain. They glide down your throat and settle in your body and warm your insides and fuel you throughout the day.
She went on to explain that what this meant for her was to choose foods that felt good in her body, not only for the moment but as they settle in your body over time. For example, when she considers what she wants to eat, she takes a number of factors into account. She monitors her hunger level, what type of texture or taste would be pleasing to her, what food would give her the energy that she desires for the tasks ahead in the coming hours.
What would that feel like to you? Can you visualize making a choice of what you want to eat using the criteria of looking for food that kisses your being and feels good in your body now and over time?
My Experience Of Testing Out This Strategy
Having the extraordinary privilege of being coached by Connirae and having her as my mentor through the years has been deeply meaningful to me. She was the first person who introduced me to the whole concept of treating my body with care and compassion.
I remember the level of shame and desperation I felt when I confided in Connirae the challenges I was having with binging at that time. Up until meeting her, I thought the only way to motivate myself was to use the same guilt and shame tactics my father used when I was a kid.
As I got older I just repeated doing things that same way he did because I loved and respected him so much. Now I realize that although he deeply cared about me when I was a child, he didn’t have the emotional bandwidth to show his love by withholding judgment and speaking to me without being critical or sarcastic.
It’s such a gift to be able to look back at my life and see so much with greater clarity. He didn’t have a clue why I had gained so much weight in such a short time living in Florida with my mother and step father. I had kept the secret of my sexual abuse to myself.
When I had in mind that I wanted to choose food that kissed my being and felt good in my body, I felt very lovingly toward myself. Holding the space for that sense of tenderness and nurturing, I made some very different choices this weekend.
As I tested out some of the foods that I had been eating, while putting on Connirae’s frame of “nurturing myself and choosing foods to kiss my being”, I noticed that those foods that I had been settling for, were not truly pleasing to me. For example, I had asked my husband to pick up some oatmeal cookies from the store on Saturday evening. He did. I tasted one, noticed a flavor that I didn’t like and didn’t continue eating.
Last night, I decided that I wanted to make my own oatmeal cookies. I thought I would substitute chocolate chips for the raisins. I had two of them, and realized that they were too chocolaty and that they didn’t feel as good in my body as they would without the chocolate. Tonight I’ll bake another batch with just raisins and oatmeal and see what happens.
Would You Like To ‘Try On’ This Strategy?
What comes up for you? What would you like to try and do now with that new information from a naturally slender gal who is schooled in eating to nurture herself. Give it a whirl and let me know how it feels when you make your next choice of food with the belief that you are seeking to find a food that kisses your being and feels good in your body now and over time. Please leave a comment and share your experience with me. I’d love to know what you are discovering.